Lifestyle Personal Development

Questions to Get to Know Someone

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How do you really get to know someone?

You ask questions.

And lots of them.

Asking questions of yourself or others is one of the best ways to get to know someone on a deeper level.

And while 20 questions and “would you rather” is fun and all, I’m talking about deep, thought-provoking questions.

Ones that make yourself and the person you’re talking to think.

Whether you’re new to dating and just getting to know someone or you want to add a new friend to your group and would like to get to know them first, these questions are perfect for everyone.

If you’re looking for questions to get to yourself, check them out here.

200 Questions to Get to Know Someone

  1. What’s your favorite smell? Why?
  2. What brings you the most joy?
  3. What do you do to cheer yourself up when you feel sad?
  4. How do you entertain yourself on long drives?
  5. When you’re having a bad day would you rather be distracted or talk it out?
  6. Do you believe in friends with benefits?
  7. Have you ever ghosted someone?
  8. What is your biggest pet peeve? Why?
  9. Do you believe in God?
  10. What is the first thing you notice on a stranger?
  11. What do you find attractive in a partner?
  12. What is the biggest lesson you’ve learned in your life so far?
  13. Do you believe people can change?
  14. Do you believe in second chances?
  15. What is a deal-breaker in your relationships? Friendships and romantic.
  16. How do you feel about the opposite political party from you?
  17. Have you ever had your heart broken before?
  18. What did you learn from your last relationship?
  19. You have a crush on someone, do you tell them or wait for them to come to you?
  20. Do you win imaginary arguments in the shower?
  21. What’s your favorite thing to do after a long day?
  22. What do you like to do on your days off?
  23. Who would play you in a movie about your life? Why?
  24. You catch your significant other cheating, what do you do and who are you mad at? (your significant other or the person they’re cheating with?)
  25. Do you believe in soulmates or twin flames?
  26. Are you happy? Why or why not?
  27. Do you believe in marriage?
  28. What is your favorite thing about yourself? (personality or physically)
  29. If you could change anything in the world and make it better, what would you change?
  30. How comfortable are you with getting out of your comfort zone?
  31. Do you prefer to save money or spend it?
  32. Can you keep a secret?
  33. What scares you more, success, or failure?
  34. How often do you talk to your family?
  35. When was the last time you gave someone a hug?
  36. What was your hometown like?
  37. Do you believe everyone has a purpose in their life?
  38. You order your favorite dish at a restaurant but it’s incorrect when you get it, how do you react to the waitstaff?
  39. Have you ever been in a polyamorous or open relationship?
  40. How do you feel about your ex(es)?
  41. When you’re dating someone, how often do you like to contact them? (Facetime, texting, spending time together)
  42. What do you do if you feel your needs aren’t being met?
  43. Has someone of the opposite sex ever made you feel uncomfortable? What did you do?
  44. Would you love your child unconditionally?
  45. You and your best friend have a crush on the same person, how do you handle this?
  46. Do you think you’re confident?
  47. What’s your favorite dinosaur? Why?
  48. How do you feel about dating apps? Why?
  49. Do you believe in sex before marriage or outside of a committed partnership?
  50. How important is trust in a relationship? Platonic or romantic.
  51. Do you believe you have the power to change your life or is your life determined by circumstances outside of your control? Or both?
  52. Someone bumped into you at a bar, what do you do?
  53. Do you prefer to fly or drive given the choice? Why?
  54. How do you feel about people that look different than you?
  55. Is cheating a deal-breaker for you?
  56. What does cheating look like to you?
  57. Do you trust the government? Why or why not?
  58. What is your stance on guns?
  59. Do you believe in the law of attraction?
  60. If someone asks you a question and you don’t know the answer what do you do?
  61. Has a man ever mansplained something to you?
  62. What makes you fall in love?
  63. Do you have regrets?
  64. Have you ever slept under the stars?
  65. What is something you’ve done that you’ll never forget? (Positive)
  66. If today was your last day, what would you spend it doing?
  67. How do you feel about gossip?
  68. If you have a problem do you fix yourself or ask for help?
  69. What is your definition of the perfect life?
  70. When you are venting to someone do you want their advice or for them to just listen?
  71. Do you prefer watching the sunrise or sunset?
  72. What do you do when you’re bored?
  73. After a date, how long do you wait until you text them?
  74. If you’re not into someone anymore, how do you tell them?
  75. Do you believe the person who asked you out on the date should pay? Why or why not?
  76. If you could be “voted the most, blank” as an adult, what would you be voted for? (Think high school yearbook)
  77. What is the one thing you would save during a zombie apocalypse?
  78. Are you a dog or a cat person?
  79. Your significant other runs into the bathroom upset, what do you do?
  80. How do you handle stress?
  81. How do you feel about BLM?
  82. Do you believe in fate?
  83. What is your relationship with your parents like?
  84. When was the last time you apologized?
  85. Would you rather have cable or internet?
  86. Do you feel like you have someone you can talk to about your problems?
  87. How often do your friends and family check up on you?
  88. What do you do for the people you love?
  89. What is your most embarrassing memory?
  90. Have you ever broken someone’s heart? Has anyone broken your heart?
  91. What are your beliefs about money?
  92. Do you have a picture in your head of how you want your life to look? Does your life look like that? Why or why not?
  93. Do you drink? Why or why not?
  94. Is the glass half-full or half-empty?
  95. What’s your biggest regret in life?
  96. You see a puppy on the side of the road, what do you do?
  97. How often do you invest in yourself?
  98. Do you believe in happy endings?
  99. Are birthdays important to you? Why or why not?
  100. Do you believe we are always learning, growing, and improving, or are we stuck with the hands we were dealt with?
  101. Do you think humans are trustworthy?
  102. Do you like routines or to just go with the flow?
  103. Can one person change the world? Why or why not?
  104. Is happiness a state of mind or do we need someone or something outside of us to be happy?
  105. Do you make decisions from your ego or your intuition?
  106. What is one TV show or movie that explains your life?
  107. Backstreet Boys or Nsync?
  108. Do you prefer the heat or the cold?
  109. What do you think about veganism?
  110. What is your dream car? Why?
  111. Do you think humans are doing more harm than good to the planet?
  112. Gryffindor, Slytherin, Ravenclaw, or Hufflepuff? 
  113. Team Edward or Team Jacob? Why?
  114. You’re stranded on the side of the road, who do you call?
  115. What do you like to do on rainy days?
  116. Your biggest dream just came true, who is the first person you tell?
  117. Least favorite holiday. Why?
  118. Do you have a friend, that if you were both 40 and single, you would get together?
  119. Do you believe that you can fall in love with someone at the wrong time? Right person, wrong time.
  120. How do you feel about people with different lifestyle choices than you?
  121. Do you think it’s better to be unhappy in a relationship and have someone or be single and lonely?
  122. How long do you give your crush to text you or snap you back before you move on from them?
  123. Do you have a journal?
  124. What does being loved feel like and look like to you?
  125. Your friend or date stands you up, do you give them a second chance? Why or why not?
  126. What is your favorite thing about your life right now?
  127. Who or what inspires you?
  128. Do you wear a mask, why or why not?
  129. Have you ever been hypnotized?
  130. What advice would you give someone that is dealing with a problem that you have right now?
  131. Do you believe in security or enjoyment in a job?  (Would you stay in a job you hate if the money is good or work a job with less pay that you love?)
  132. Do you take other people’s advice?
  133. Describe your perfect date.
  134. All of the people you’ve ever loved are in one room, who do you run to? Who runs to you?
  135. Have you ever been in a relationship with a narcissist?
  136. You’ve had a couple of drinks and you’re lonely, who do you text?
  137. Do you have a secure, avoidant, or anxious attachment style?
  138. If someone asked you to watch their drink and another person tried to take it from you, what would you do?
  139. What is your favorite time in history?
  140. Would you rather be famous and be a millionaire or a be a millionaire but no one knows you?
  141. When was the last time you cried?
  142. Do you believe most people are good?
  143. How easy is it for you to trust people?
  144. If someone loses your trust, can they get it back? How?
  145. Do you believe a relationship is 50/50 or 100/100?
  146. Do you believe in zodiac signs and astrology?
  147. Who was your first crush?
  148. What tv character sparked your sexual awakening?
  149. The barista tells you to enjoy your coffee and you say, “you’re welcome”. How long do you think about that?
  150. Do you overthink?
  151. Would you rather be a veterinarian or a doctor? Why?
  152. Would you rather be called vain or insecure?
  153. Do you sing in the car?
  154. Do you believe in kissing on the first date? Why or why not?
  155. What is the “weirdest” thing your family does?
  156. What fashion trend do you hate? Why or why not?
  157. What do you think about the body positive movement?
  158. What things or situations make you feel unsure about yourself?
  159. Do you look to others for validation?
  160. What is your stance on mental health?
  161. Someone you love and care about has lost someone close to them, how do you show up for them?
  162. Do you believe in love at first sight?
  163. What is your love language?
  164. How would people close to you describe you?
  165. Is your family’s acceptance of the person you’re dating important to you?
  166. When do you introduce your significant other to your family?
  167. Have you ever experienced losing someone really close to you?
  168. Do you believe people can fall out of love with each other?
  169. What do you do when you unintentionally hurt someone?
  170. What are your sexual preferences?
  171. What calms you down?
  172. Have you ever lived with a significant other?
  173. Do you get jealous of other people?
  174. Do you believe your significant other can have a best friend of the opposite or same-sex?
  175. Can exes be friends? Why or why not?
  176. Are humans fueled by greed or love?
  177. What is your biggest turn on? Turn off?
  178. Do you believe in conspiracy theories?
  179. What is the biggest lie you’ve ever told?
  180. Do you believe being in love and loving someone is different?
  181. What’s your favorite form of self-care?
  182. What has been your longest romantic relationship?
  183. What excites you the most?
  184. What is your favorite holiday memory and why?
  185. Do you think it’s okay to change your mind in a relationship?
  186. Do you identify as an introvert or extrovert?
  187. Do you think you can change your identity?
  188. What kind of parent do you think you will be?
  189. What qualities do you admire about your parents?
  190. Do you believe opposites attract?
  191. Would you ever have a long-distance relationship?
  192. When was the last time you did something spontaneous?
  193. What is your greatest fear?
  194. Would you rather have 100 friends that you weren’t super close to or 2 best friends that knew everything about you and you knew everything about them?
  195. Do you feel understood?
  196. Do you watch the news? Why or why not?
  197. If you could get away with one thing, what would it be?
  198. Do you believe in karma?
  199. If you had the ability to erase something from your past what would it be?
  200. When you’re old and gray, who do you want sitting next to you on that rocking chair?

Asking questions is Important

While some of these questions may seem trivial, they are all designed to reveal the person’s values and beliefs which is extremely important for you to decide if you want to continue talking to them or not.

Of course, asking questions is important but always remember, actions speak louder than words.

Watch the person’s actions and make sure they align with what they say.

And remember this, when someone shows you who they are, believe them.

If you want 300 more questions and journal prompts to ask yourself to get to know YOU better check them out here.

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